MIKE: “Alright, let’s go over the facts of the case again.”
[MUSIC FADES IN]
DARIUS: “You wouldn’t happen to know of any places where drug addicts or meth labs would be?”
GWEN: Rosetta Kamen is a young woman. She grew up in a not so great situation. Her dad was involved with some shady stuff.
CHRISTINE: And I am playing the character Desdemona Brown. She is a medium psychic with the trouble aspect of Never Truly Alone. Sometimes Jack helps me, no, that’s bad. We don’t know exactly what Jack is.
MIKE: The details you particularly make out, some of these limbs seem to be wrapped directly around Desdemona’s neck, as if choking her. There is some sort of tunnel in the pilings that goes out to the waterfront. There is a man with shaggy hair and very dirty clothes, and he just says, “Well shit.” What appears to be Champ, the Lake Champlain sea monster—
THOM: No!
GWEN: Oh my god.
MIKE: -- emerging from under the former Burlington electric plant. While Sylvester thinks he sees one, he in fact sees two.
[INTRO MUSIC]
THOM: Alright, so last time we got a Major Milestone—
MIKE: Significant, Significant—
THOM: -- from watching the Lake Champlain monster—Significant Milestone, because we watched the Lake Champlain monster swim away from us while some of us were paralyzed, and one of us was just confused.
MIKE: So, I do have a question for Christine. Did you figure out anything to do with that skill point?
CHRISTINE: No, I didn’t. It’s been a week, I’m sorry.
MIKE: Oh, it’s okay.
GWEN: She can speak to twice as many ghosts.
MIKE: Yes, there are two ghosts now.
DARIUS: It is the spooky month again.
CHRISTINE: At least now my ghost friend has a friend, another ghost friend.
MIKE: Okay, well there are some avenues you could take with that skill point.
THOM: Scholarship or Resources or Stealth? Scholarship or Resources would probably be the more reasonable, honestly.
CHRISTINE: Or Alertness.
THOM: Oh yeah, that’s right, you have that.
DARIUS: Endurance.
MIKE: Yeah.
CHRISTINE: Then let’s shift Alertness. Bump that up.
MIKE: Okay, let me mark that on the Google doc. That’s fantastic. So, you are up to a two Alertness. You are twice as alert as you used to be.
DARIUS: Everything is going to kill you.
CHRISTINE: Okay, well that explains— I knew that already.
DARIUS: Well, now you know it twice as much.
CHRISTINE: Now I know that Sylvester will be the cause of my death. I mean, what?
DARIUS: Probably.
MIKE: You know what? We’re going to use that as a jumping off point.
DARIUS: It's like having spider sense, but you don’t have any proper way to defend yourself because you don’t have the other spider powers.
MIKE: Yeah.
CHRISTINE: Curse of Cassandra, but worse.
DARIUS: There’s a fist coming my way, but I lack the agility to actually avoid the fist, so I might as well just clench my teeth.
MIKE: Speaking of, you’ve got Street Fighter now for your Significant Milestone, so do you want to talk about that?
DARIUS: [Hums Street Fighter music]
THOM: Really, you didn’t go with—
CHRISTINE: He wants to sing it.
MIKE: Look, I love Yoko Shimomura’s music as much as the next person, but—
DARIUS: Yeah, so anyway, Street Fighter. You don’t fight by the rules. If there’s a piece of lead pipe lying around, you’ll use it. You may use your Fists skill to wield improvised weapons.
MIKE: That kicks ass. It also takes—oh sorry.
DARIUS: And I also put a point in Fists.
MIKE: Yes! So, your Fists is now a three.
DARIUS: Yeah.
MIKE: You have three Fists, you are God's affront to nature.
DARIUS: Yep. I am the God Hammer.
THOM: So, we are now turning Sylvester Coopersmith into a JoJo character.
DARIUS: Well, I guess I would be a Street Fighter Alpha character.
MIKE: Any of the above.
THOM: Yare yare daze.
MIKE: You’re a mortal, so you don’t get the power to stop time, so we’re not going to turn you into a Dio Brando.
DARIUS: Yeah.
MIKE: But yeah. Street Fighter does cost you the one refresh, which is fine because you have so much refresh from being a regular old mortal. So, can I get your total refresh?
DARIUS: My points is six or seven.
MIKE: Your total refresh is now minus seven, because we’re at refresh level seven, but you get two extra, so you will be getting two Fate Points per session. Yay. Ro, did you do anything with your new skill point? Your ability that changed stuff around.
GWEN: So, I had two different options, because I didn’t know if the first was okay, but I bumped Athletics up to one. So, now I have six Average. Is that good?
MIKE: Oh absolutely.
GWEN: Okay, cool.
MIKE: You can have as many in one as you want really, because you just have to have more under the number. So, Athletics.
GWEN: Okay, neat. Yes, because I probably should be athletic, and I didn’t invest anything into that.
MIKE: That is fair.
DARIUS: Nothing a few pointless backflips can’t solve.
MIKE: Yes.
GWEN: Exactly.
MIKE: There you go. And hey, now you can bump more stuff up to two from one. You can do that easier. Albion, what did you do Thom?
THOM: So, yeah. I did a couple things. I changed one of my Aspect names, and I also gave myself a plus one to one of my stats. My Rapport is now a two, because I realized I had always intended for Albion not to be as much of a talker, and then I did a lot of talking, so Albion needs to be better at it, and I feel like we can justify that by him sort of coming more into his own in these situations where he’s the one who has a lot of actual practical experience with what they’re dealing with, so he’s sort of naturally kind of takes lead on it. I don’t want him to become the group leader, I just think he’s sort of better at taking charge when it’s like “Alright, shit’s going down,” so Rapport I think works for that.
MIKE: Okay.
THOM: I also changed his Aspect I Saw What Was Behind The Curtain, Now I Hunt It to Odin-Blessed Stalker Of Shadows, with his connection to Gungnir and the Valknut, I believe he’s probably getting more in touch with that part of himself, and since he’s a True Believer, I feel like some of his Aspects should more reflect that. So, having him have an actual thing that represents his connection to Odin that I can use as an actual Aspect tag makes plenty of sense to me at least.
MIKE: Yeah, absolutely. There was one Aspect that you were going to change, Desdemona, correct?
CHRISTINE: I did. I changed Grammy Came to the Tea Party; I changed it to Born With The Gift.
MIKE: Born With The Gift. Yeah, I do love this refinement of people’s Aspects into something a little more usable perhaps in different contexts. Very cool. So, everybody is now a little bit powered up from having a significant milestone, and yeah, I feel like the case has turned a corner and you’ve had some interesting revelations, including the Lake Champlain lake monster, Champ.
THOM: There’s two of them in the water apparently, and they are submarines, maybe, and we’re standing in a meth lab.
GWEN: There are at least two champs, and it’s not a meth lab, it’s a drug running facility.
MIKE: I’m so glad that you’re the one that’s making that correction.
DARIUS: It’s a legitimate businessman’s pharmaceutical operations.
GWEN: Important to know the distinction between the two, come on guys.
THOM: Well, I mean that’s why they’re running it out of a basement, because it’s perfectly legitimate.
MIKE: Yes. So, what I’m going to say is since the moment where you were all in the sort of underside of the former electric light plant down in the pilings, I feel like we can just sort of jump to all of you having come above ground looking out at whatever the hell is going on.
CHRISTINE: Quick question.
MIKE: Yes.
CHRISTINE: Now, didn’t we say something along the lines of this location that we are at is rather close to the police station?
MIKE: It is, yes. It is basically across the street from the police station.
CHRISTINE: Yep, that’s what I thought I remembered.
THOM: “We’re kind of going to want to find a way to clear out without being super noticed. So, fun. Also, I don’t know if you can tell from my tone, but I am mighty pissed off right now.”
MIKE: So, I assume we’re just going to kind of gather above ground outside where you can all pretty clearly see across the lake. So, the thing that came from underneath the building, it seems to be trying to go somewhere across the Lake Champlain, but then something moving with a little more fluidity comes up from below the surface and just lands the plesiosaur equivalent of a haymaker on this thing.
THOM: Albion just kind of his eyes go entirely wide and he’s just like, “Oh my god, this is the coolest fucking thing I’ve ever seen. Champ versus Mecha-Champ, I watched that movie as a kid, this is fucking rad!”
MIKE: So, you see the—as you’re calling it now Mecha-Champ, it actually takes its jaws and clamps them around Champ—as you’re assuming, Champ’s neck, biting in, and it’s pretty nasty. Do any of you have any reaction to what you’re doing? Like anything that you’re going to actually do?
GWEN: “I’m going to take out my phone and start recording, but yes Des?”
CHRISTINE: “Ro, I was going to say, does your phone have one of those fancy recording things?”
GWEN: “It does. I’m trying to get all of this on my phone.”
MIKE: Okay.
THOM: “You’re not going to post that on like a TikTok or whatever, are you?”
GWEN: “Gross, no.”
MIKE: That question is answered quite suddenly, because as you are starting to record, your phone screen goes completely black.
GWEN: “Ah! What the hell?”
MIKE: And also, I assume you drop it when the sparks start flying.
GWEN: That’s a safe assumption. “What the hell?”
MIKE: So, as flesh Champ, I guess, is sort of being nabbed at by the jaws of this mechanical creature, perhaps the most surprising thing of all today happens. The water around the mechanical Champ freezes. Just in an instant, it flash freezes, and it seems that this has thrown a little bit of confusion on the mechanical Champ’s part, and it releases its grip and as the water unfreezes in just as quick of a time, the mechanical Champ appears to be trying to get away. Does anybody have anything that they’re going to do right now?
THOM: I mean, can I get to them?
MIKE: They’re a little too far out on the water for you to get there, because you don’t have any sort of vehicle at your disposal.
THOM: Is there a boat anywhere? Anything I could use to start chasing this thing down?
MIKE: Make me an Alertness roll.
THOM: That’s one of the things I’m good at. That’s a five. Sorry, four. No, five! I have a three for that.
MIKE: Yeah, alright. So, you are keenly aware that the nearby boats all belong to the Coast Guard.
GWEN: Rob the Ghost Guard. Coast Guard, oh my god. Do it.
MIKE: Amazing.
THOM: The ‘Ghost Card?’
GWEN: I think yeah.
MIKE: Yes, that’s it. The campaign has ended. You’ve solved the riddle.
THOM: Well, believe it or not, Albion is not going to steal a boat from the armed forces.
MIKE: Aw.
DARIUS: Smart.
THOM: And he just looks out and is like, “So, does anyone have any ideas? Because my idea was ‘steal a boat,’ and all the boats are going to have us on a black site if we steal them, so.”
CHRISTINE: “Should we maybe call somebody?”
THOM: “Yeah.”
MIKE: Well, you just saw what happened to Ro’s phone.
DARIUS: Yeah.
THOM: “Yeah, well my phone’s a piece of shit old time phone, it’s probably fine.”
MIKE: Before you can make any more decisions, there is an explosion, as it seems like Champ has just struck the mechanical Champ with a fireball.
GWEN: “What the hell?”
DARIUS: “Champ has magic?”
THOM: “What in God’s name—”
GWEN: “What?”
DARIUS: “Magic Champ?”
THOM: “Is Champ a wizard or some shit?”
DARIUS: “Probably.”
MIKE: A fireball strikes the mechanical champ and seems to blow its entire neck wide open. It submerges.
DARIUS: Wait, did Champ freeze it and then heat it to make it break faster?
THOM: Hey, can I make a Lore roll to figure out what the hell Champ is real quick?
MIKE: You can absolutely make a Lore roll, and I’m going to tell you that your target for right now is an eight.
THOM: Fuck it, opening The Sight.
MIKE: Hoo boy! Okay, so you are opening The Sight.
THOM: “Guys, I’m going to take a gander at this. If I pass out, please drag my ass back.”
DARIUS: “Sure.”
THOM: “Thanks Sylvester, I knew I could count on you.”
MIKE: Thank you for doing the thing that I forgot that your character could do and maybe had not anticipated your character doing.
THOM: That’s why you’re a good dungeon master. You’re going to improvise the shit out of this. You’re going to “Yes, and…” me, right?
DARIUS: Curveball.
MIKE: You are damn straight I’m going to “Yes, and…” you. Alright.
THOM: Play in the space with me, Michael.
MIKE: So, you snap open The Sight, and it is absolutely buck wild.
THOM: [laughter] Off to a stellar start. I’m going to die doing this.
MIKE: There are ley lines, naked and visible through the water of Lake Champlain. You can see Champ appears to be basically hanging in one of them right now as the mechanical one is just sinking and just seems to be disappearing, and yeah, you try to look directly at Champ, the Lake Champlain monster, and before I actually reveal anything, I’m going to have you make that defense roll against what you’re looking at. So, it’s a Discipline roll with a target of eight.
THOM: All pluses, baby. With my Lore, that is a six. I am going to—
MIKE: That’s not Lore, it's Discipline.
THOM: Discipline, right. Fuck, that’s worse.
DARIUS: Rut row.
THOM: Cool, what is my refresh?
MIKE: It’s two.
THOM: Okay, cool. I’m going to have to burn both of my Fate Points. I think I only have three right now. I forget how many I had, it’s been a while. Yeah, I’m going to burn two of my Fate Points.
MIKE: Okay, what are you burning them on?
THOM: Odin-Blessed Stalker Of Shadows and Hard Traveling, Magic Dabbling, Gun Slinging Monster Hunter.
MIKE: Alright, tagging your High Concept. Fun, fun, fun. Okay.
THOM: If I can survive looking at Mr. Jack, I can survive whatever the fuck this is, we hope.
MIKE: So, awesome. You have succeeded at not taking damage from the strength of the vision that you’re looking at, so that means that you can close your third eye now on successive rounds after this, so no I’ll tell you what you are looking at.
THOM: Then I’m going to have to make a Lore roll, yeah?
MIKE: You’re going to have to make a Lore roll to try to understand it. There are five colors to Champ that swirl around. Make a Lore roll to try to figure out what that means?
THOM: What’s my target?
MIKE: It’s eight, because it’s the strength of the vision.
THOM: Again, all four pluses, holy shit.
MIKE: How in the hell did you roll that twice?
THOM: I have no idea. I really don’t. I’ll send you a photo if you want.
GWEN: It’s a gift of The Sight, that’s what it is.
THOM: I have one more Fate Point, I’m tagging—I don’t know, what am I tagging? High Concept again, I guess.
MIKE: [laughter] Oh man. Oofa doofa. I am not exactly sure how to play that.
THOM: If you would prefer, we can edit this out, and we can not say I used my Fate Point, and I can roll again.
MIKE: Oh no no no. You can choose to use your Fate Point right now. I guess that’s the best thing that you’ve got, but justify, because that’s how this works. It’ll definitely give you a pretty major piece of information because you’re using The Sight, and that’s—I mean, it’s up to you whether you want to go that way or not.
THOM: Okay. Honestly, I’m going to change my Aspect tag. I think I’m going to do Odin-Blessed Stalker Of Shadows and kind of say that I’m giving strength to my faith to push through and force myself to comprehend what I’m looking at.
MIKE: Okay, you know what, that’s got something to it. I’ll buy it. I’ll accept it. I’ll take your Fate Point. I’ll exhaust you of your precious resources. Okay, cool. So, you’ve spent enough time around people that can do different kinds of magic that you understand something pretty important, in that there are five elements of magic: earth, water, air, fire, and spirit. Yeah, those are the five colors that correspond to that going around Champ. Champ’s a goddamn Wizard.
THOM: Alright, I’m going to close The Sight. “Champ is a goddamn Wizard.”
DARIUS: “Yeah, we know, we just saw.”
MIKE: Thom.
THOM: What?
MIKE: Albion knows that Champ is the oldest Wizard.
THOM: He's the Merlin?
MIKE: I did not say that.
THOM: “No, he’s not just a Wizard, he’s fucking THE wizard.”
MIKE: So, the way in which he was interacting with the ley lines around there, you made an inference with your lore roll that like, he’s extremely familiar with those surroundings, and just is so magically in tune with his environment and the power that he draws upon, it comes from somewhere deeply, deeply ancient.
THOM: “This is an incredibly ancient, incredibly powerful spell slinger of some kind, and apparently it is also the famous Lake Champlain monster. I do not understand what is going on beyond that. My head hurts, I’m tired. I had to dig deep to get that kind of information, I—Sorry, what was that Sylvester?”
DARIUS: Sorry, I’m going to take a swig from my flask, then offer Albion some, because he looks like he needs it more than me.
THOM: Albion’s going to take a very long pull of that flask and then hand it back. “This has given me an answer that only opens several thousand more questions, and another conversation with the Warden, which I’m sure none of you are looking forward to.”
DARIUS: “You know damn well we aren’t.”
THOM: “I mean, he’s not that bad, guys, all things considered.”
DARIUS: “I mean, I know he’s not that bad, but it’s just—he could be better.”
MIKE: Okay.
THOM: “I love that we’re having this conversation while the Lake Champlain sea monster is fighting Mechagodzilla.”
CHRISTINE: “Yeah, are we—?”
DARIUS: “I mean, what the fuck do you expect us to do about it?”
CHRISTINE: “Are we safe right now?”
MIKE: To that point, you can see now that the mechanical monster has gotten some distance between Champ and it, and you don’t know how it’s still moving, and then it stops moving, at least the way that it was, because then it explodes.
CHRISTINE: “Holy cow!”
DARIUS: “Sweet.”
THOM: “Hot diggity damn.”
MIKE: Yeah, so that has now exploded, and if any of you are glimpsing back that way, you can see Champ dip back under the water and out of sight, and now there’s the sound of police sirens.
THOM: “We need to leave.”
DARIUS: “Yep. To the crapmobile.”
MIKE: Alright.
CHRISTINE: “Do you think we need a veil to get out of here?”
THOM: “I don’t actually know if we need a veil. I have not turned around.” Consequently, Albion turns around.
MIKE: Yeah, it looks like people—it looks like there are police cars that are heading away from the police station down toward the park and the docks at the wharf. The place with the ferry launches from.
THOM: “So, we’re not the problem this time. Let’s just stay put for a sec and kind of let this die down a little and then head back and discuss what we’ve learned today, and then tonight, let’s go hunt some monsters.”
MIKE: As you are heading back to your vehicle, you see another vehicle parked behind yours.
THOM: Neat.
MIKE: And it does seem to be occupied by a couple of people who, as they see you approach, they step out of the vehicle. They are impeccably dressed in suits and sunglasses.
GWEN: I don’t like this.
DARIUS: Oh boy.
CHRISTINE: Do they look familiar to Desdemona or Ro?
MIKE: No, actually. These do not look like people that either of you have seen before.
CHRISTINE: That’s good.
GWEN: Okay, still don’t like it.
MIKE: Yeah, make me an Alertness roll, Ro, with a target of one.
GWEN: That’s Alertness, so that’s a three total.
MIKE: Okay, great. So, because you succeeded by a couple extra shifts, not only is this not somebody from your father’s “business,” quote-unquote, this looks like the exact opposite kind of person.
THOM: “Howdy there, friend. So, how can we help you?”
MIKE: So, Ro, you’re not as surprised as you ought to be, Ro, when one of them addresses you and says “Rosetta Kamen?”
GWEN: “Oh, can we help you folks?”
MIKE: “Yeah, you can help. Agent Pyburn, FBI. We have a few questions for you.”
THOM: “Are we being detained, officer?”
MIKE: “Yeah.”
GWEN: “What is this about?”
MIKE: As he’s saying this, his partner is sort of circling around to the other side of the group. “Well, it’s about a few things, including whatever in the hell just went down there on the lake, so.”
DARIUS: Can I circle that guy while he’s circling?
MIKE: Sure, you can start doing that, at which point they’re basically going to push their coat aside so you can tell that they’re showing you their weapon.
DARIUS: Oh, spiffy.
MIKE: Do you continue trying to circle?
DARIUS: Well, nah.
MIKE: Okay. “Yeah, you and your friends? We kind of need to talk to you about a few different things. Maybe some stuff that you’re investigating, that maybe we’re investigating too. I feel like we could be collaborators.”
THOM: “That’s some mighty leading talk. I mean, obviously since we’re being detained, I believe we will cooperate, but you’ll forgive me if I’m a might confused and a might wary.”
MIKE: “Yep. Ah, well Albion—Mr. Graves, I’m sorry, where are my manners?”
THOM: “Ah fuck, they know my name. Ah damn it. Ah Shit. Ah beans.”
MIKE: “I feel like maybe you’ll understand this significantly better.” So, I need to make a roll at you. Okay, cool. That was not very good, but it was definitely—
THOM: What am I defending with?
MIKE: I’m actually finding that out right now. Oh, you defend with Discipline, and you are defending—I rolled bad. So, that is going to be a four versus your Discipline.
THOM: Alright, I rolled three. So, plus one, that is four.
MIKE: Cool. Oh wow, okay. So, you’re not going to take the effects of it, but you realize what just happened because you just started to feel very, very afraid. More so than would be a normal response in this situation. You’ve been keeping your cool, clearly in the face of an uncomfortable and possibly fear-causing situation with these individuals saying that they’re detaining you, but this was a deep primal fear that you just had to fight off, and you did, but for a moment your fight or flight response was just super activated.
THOM: Alright. Should I make a Lore check?
MIKE: Ah, you super should, and for you, the target is going to be two.
THOM: Alrighty, that comes out neutral, and my Lore is two.
MIKE: Well, you’ve definitely dealt with White Court Vampires before.
CHRISTINE: Oh no.
GWEN: Boo.
DARIUS: Ah no.
THOM: I’m just going to start walking forward until I am nose to nose with this person.
MIKE: Before you can get nose to nose, they have drawn their weapon.
THOM: “Yeah, cute. We both know you don’t need that shit.”
MIKE: “Nah, but it saves me a lot of paperwork.”
THOM: “Why the fuck is a Malvora working for the FBI?”
MIKE: “Well, that’s a real good question. I suppose a better question is what happens to you if you don’t come with us.”
THOM: “Well.”
MIKE: “I’m sorry, that was way more threatening than I meant it to be.”
THOM: “It did come across as a rather threatening—“
MIKE: “Ah geez, I do that sometimes. It’s just this natural thing where I just—“
THOM: “I’m sure being a scary motherfucker comes naturally to you, yeah.”
MIKE: “Yeah, it really does. I just get extra intimidating, and people—I push witnesses. God, I always get to play ‘bad cop.’ I mean, it is very, very fun playing bad cop. You don’t get it, man—”
DARIUS: “Oh indeed.”
THOM: “Okay, so you are actually part of the FBI. This isn’t some bullshit where ‘Oh, we’re wearing a dollar store disguise because we’re White Court, so we can get away with that shit.’”
MIKE: “What? No. My name is Agent Pyburn, I’m actually part of the FBI.” He shows you his badge.
GWEN: “Sorry, what’s the number on that?”
MIKE: “What’s that?”
GWEN: “Yeah, I need your badge number.”
MIKE: Fuck you. But Ro, you do recognize an FBI badge, and that one looks quite valid.
GWEN: Shit, okay. “Where are you intending on bringing us, exactly?”
THOM: “Alright.”
MIKE: “Look, oh no, I just need to take you back to— I feel like there’s a lot to explain. We can probably explain it better in the car.”
THOM: “There’s a lot of us. We should probably take two vehicles.”
MIKE: “Well, okay. In that case, since we’re doing things a little unconventional I guess, and believe me, this is a very friendly thing right now,” he holds up both hands, just holsters his weapon and holds both hands palms out. “We’re detaining you mostly out of necessity because we just need to talk and stuff, and also because we’re the fucking FBI.”
GWEN: “Figures.”
MIKE: “Rules and procedures and whatever.”
THOM: “Well, I mean, you’ll forgive me if I came off a bit tense, but the last time I met a White Court, we kind of scrapped, so.”
MIKE: “Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, that guy sucked.”
THOM: “Oh yes, you know about—of course you fucking know about that. Goddamn FBI bullshit. Alright, let’s go.”
MIKE: “Yeah, like I said, we’re the fucking FBI. I know quite a few things about you, Mr. Graves, so look—“
THOM: “Okay, that’s a conversation for private.”
MIKE: “Yeah, well okay, I’m going to relent a little bit here. We’re not going to force you to come with us, but there is an address, and we would really, really like to talk to you there. So, how about this: I know you’re in the middle of your own stuff, but we got some things that we need sorted out, and we think you could be valuable, mister monster hunter, so,” he gives you a card with an address on it and says, “We’re going to be heading back to this location. You can choose to meet us there and follow us, make the drive real quick, easy, follow the cops. Anyway, I’m trying to be—I kind of overcompensate on the ‘trying to be friendly’ and ‘relating to people’ on account of the,” he starts itching his neck, “nature of things, so you’ll forgive me if I come off disingenuous.”
THOM: “Alright, we’ll discuss it on the road, I guess.”
MIKE: “Ah, cool. Cool, cool, cool. Great. So, if we’re going to take two vehicles, who’s riding with me?”
[MUSIC FADES IN]
MIKE: Are you going to go like two and two?
THOM: I was thinking all four of us would go in our card and they would go on in theirs, and we would talk ourselves on the road.
GWEN: That feels safer, yeah.
MIKE: Yeah, that’s fair.
THOM: So, the answer is none of us are riding with them.
MIKE: Yes.
THOM: So, on the ride over, Albion’s going to just be like, “Alright, so we can peel off any time and just fuck off home, but I’ve got to admit, my curiosity is kind of piqued.”
GWEN: “I need to know what’s in it for us, what we gain by giving them information we have. They should know more than us about the situation, as they claim. I don’t want them to get information from us and arrest us. I’m not about that life.”
THOM: “Alright, that’s Ro’s take on the situation. Des, what are your thoughts?”
CHRISTINE: “I’ve never been in trouble a day in my life, so I’m a little overwhelmed right now. I think cooperation might be the way to go?”
THOM: “Alright, Sylvester?”
DARIUS: “Well, we don’t really know a lot, so maybe they know something? Doubtful, but it’s worth a shot.”
THOM: “Well, I know one of them is a goddamn vampire, and that’s not a great start.”
DARIUS: “That’s true.”
THOM: “Yeah, so that’s already got me on edge. But on the other hand—“
DARIUS: “Should we swing by the supermarket and get garlic, or what?”
THOM: “It’s not that kind of vampire.”
DARIUS: “Okay.”
GWEN: “Have you tried it?”
THOM: “If it was that, they’d look kind of more corpsey.”
DARIUS: “Got you.”
THOM: “And less creepy sexy.”
MIKE: Yeah, it is worth noting that both of the FBI agents were very attractive.
THOM: “Alrighty. I say we hear them out. In any case, I’m going in there packing. Any objections?”
DARIUS: “No, not really.”
GWEN: “No.”
CHRISTINE: “No.”
THOM: “Alright, let’s go talk to the feds, I guess.”
MIKE: The location that they’ve given you is somewhere well outside of town, it’s roughly an hour’s drive, and it seems to be some kind of resort. So, can I get a history roll from whomever would like to make one, especially Des, with a target of three?”
CHRISTINE: Okay. Scholarship history?
MIKE: Yes, that one
CHRISTINE: Only two.
MIKE: Okay. So, you could be going in blind, or you could go in armed with a little more information if you dropped a Fate Point.
THOM: I don’t have this skill, but I’m just going to roll anyway. No, that is a negative one. “I’m not local, I don’t know shit.”
CHRISTINE: Yeah, I know the only thing I can think of is maybe Born With The Gift, as in I’m native—I have a very strong matrilineal line for Burlington, Vermont, and would—
MIKE: So, this is specifically a regional knowledge question, if you know the history of this place.
CHRISTINE: Yeah. I’m having trouble finding a—how about this, how about Hey, I Can Actually Do This, I was a very good history major.
MIKE: [laughter] That might be the best justification that we’re going to get, so you know what? I’ll take your Fate Point.
CHRISTINE: Okay.
MIKE: Okay, so you happen to know that this particular place has some interesting history. It’s kind of an upscale, almost private place that a lot of famous people are known for having visited, including multiple presidents, and it always seemed like the kind of place that you were like, “Yeah, I’m never going to get to go there,” because you basically have to be invited or know somebody. It’s that kind of ritzy special fancy place. You follow them, kind of disappointing the agent, Pyburn, when he finds out that none of you are riding with him and he’s not riding with you, but here you are, and it is an old wooden structure. It was renovated at some point and replaced with something a little more modern, possibly in the 80’s, but since then has played host to several modern presidents, as well as various interesting celebrities, and it looks like it’s got a ski lift off to one side for kind of private ski times. The FBI agents are, well, they’re happy to see that you have in fact followed them all the way there, gets over their disappointment at not having had interesting conversation with all of y’all. “Hopefully you found your drive to be alright. You know, sometimes it can be a bit of a bear in January, but, you know, the Notch ain’t closed yet, so you can still get up here.”
THOM: “I mean, I’ve got to admit, this place is kind of swanky.”
MIKE: “Come on in, take a look around, hang your jackets up over at the—you know what? Let’s just walk inside.” So, walking into this place, the foyer is—well, it’s small, but it’s still quite ornate. It definitely belies a history of, well, rich people. It’s one of those places where, because it was built at the time it was built, the opulence mostly comes from the kind of wood that’s carved around—the carving itself into the wood is very beautiful, very technical, so it’s just one of those things that they packed all of the beauty, grace, and high fashion that they could into a small place, to the point where it kind of comes off as chintzy to anybody who’s not super into that.
CHRISTINE: Desdemona is super into that. She is touching everything.
MIKE: Beautiful. Everything is nicely polished, as it ought to be. You can see your fingerprints being left on certain surfaces, that’s how nicely polished everything is, and you pass by photos of the various people that have stayed here. You can see different musicians, different actors, and the various presidents that have stayed, including one Bill Clinton, and as you can hang your coats and such up on the coat racks by the door in the foyer, Agent Pyburn just sort of looks over at their partner, who you discovered is Agent Wilson, and just sort of nods them off in a direction and says, “Yeah, head this way. There’s a lot of wonderful, beautiful carved doors in this place, but we’re not going through any of those.”
THOM: “Alright, cool.”
MIKE: “So, you head back through sort of a servant passageway for kitchen staff and the various folks that would accommodate travelers at a place like this, and you go into one of the service doors and there is a stairway down into a basement underneath. “So, yeah, this is kind of—a lot of famous people come through here, a lot of real interesting folks, but they all had one thing in common.”
THOM: “Yeah?”
MIKE: “Oh, thank you so much for finishing that pregnant pause.” He opens up a door, and there is just a lounge down there. It is man cave, and it is beautiful. Leather everywhere, and there’s even a hot tub in one room, maybe two hot tubs. There’s definitely a billiards table. Everything is just decked out in furs, and the walls have all sorts of really pleasant to look at art, but also trophies of animals from various hunts. “They all liked to be entertained.”
THOM: Is there a Nintendo Switch?
MIKE: Make me an Alertness roll.
THOM: That is a three.
MIKE: Yeah, there is a cabinet that seems to contain all sorts of game systems, but it doesn’t look like it’s been used a lot.
THOM: But is there a Nintendo Switch in it?
MIKE: Yes, there’s a Nintendo Switch in it.
THOM: This place is fucking baller.
GWEN: “The standards are so high with you, Albion.”
THOM: “I mean, they don’t have Ale-8-One, so they can’t be that great, but still, I feel way too poor to be here.”
MIKE: “Oh no, we’ve had some Kentuckians come through here, so we keep things stocked.”
THOM: “This place is the best. I am willing to offer any support I can—I mean, I’m not that easily bought, but.”
MIKE: “Aw, that’s a real shame.”
THOM: “It was a goof. I was goofing, I don’t need pop that bad.”
MIKE: “Ah, that’s a bummer. Oh well. Look, there’s a lot of things that go on down here, and there’s a lot of reasons why Agent Wilson and I might be part of a Federal Bureau of Investigation and whatnot. When you get the kind of clientele that this place does, you maybe don’t need a lot of things getting publicized.”
THOM: “So, you’re saying this room is a private—like very private, no security, no nothing.”
MIKE: “Real private. Oh, no, there’s security, but not that kind.”
THOM: “Alright, neat. So, you invited us. Shall you introduce the conversation that we need to have?”
MIKE: “Well excuse me, okay. I guess, first question: what exactly has kept you in Burlington for a little while now, Mr. Graves?”
THOM: “I have no goddamn idea. I just keep finding things to do, and I keep hanging around. Most of the time I would have moved on by now, but what can I say, I guess I like the company.”
MIKE: “That’s very sentimental of you, but normally you kind of move around a lot. Don’t stay in one place too long, do you?”
THOM: “Normally, yeah.”
MIKE: “Is there something special about Burlington and the ‘company?’”
THOM: “Well, I mean we kind of bonded over a hag violence and pie, and I guess I just kind of stuck around. I mean, I’ll be honest, there’s a weird concentration of supernatural activity around here, so I’ve just been kind of keeping tabs on it.”
MIKE: “Yeah, I was going to ask. It was you guys that closed down the Three Sisters, wasn’t it?”
DARIUS: “Possibly.”
THOM: “Debatably.”
MIKE: “Man, that pie was fucking good though.”
THOM: “Their pie was fucking good, and it is a goddamn tragedy.”
DARIUS: “Yeah, it was a pretty good pie.”
MIKE: “Yeah, speaking of, what brings a New Yorker up here?”
DARIUS: “Let’s just say Columbia wouldn’t take me, and I didn’t feel like working for CUNY.”
MIKE: “Yeah, yep, that’s about what I expected you’d say. You got a good position up there at the college there, doctor—sorry, don’t want to call you mister, Dr. Coopersmith. How’s the University of Vermont treating you?”
DARIUS: “I mean, decent. Can’t really complain.”
MIKE: “Yeah? You got a good relationship with your students?”
DARIUS: “Yeah, I’d say so. I haven’t seen any shitty reviews on ratemyprofessors yet.”
MIKE: “No, I imagine you would not have. It seems like you’ve endeared yourself to students of all kinds. Maybe not even ones that are going through your courses.”
DARIUS: “Yeah, that sounds about right.”
THOM: Albion just kind of going to—his gaze is going to harden, and he’s going to make meaningful eye contact at this point.
MIKE: You get a plastered-on smile as he meets your gaze, and without breaking that eye contact, he says, “And you’ve lived here quite a while, in contrast to the rest of these folks, haven’t you miss—sorry, Ms. Brown?”
CHRISTINE: “I was born in Burlington. I’ve lived here all my life.” She’s actually found a piece of fur and she’s fiddling with it just nervously in her hands.
MIKE: “Hey, it’s okay, you don’t have to worry. We’re not—no one’s threatening anybody right now. I know that was a strangely specific denial, but no. Nothing bad is going to happen here. We just have some questions.”
CHRISTINE: “About where we’re located?”
MIKE: “No, this is mostly preliminary, okay? I guess I should probably just turn my attention to you, Ms. Kamen.”
GWEN: Ro at this point is just sitting cross-legged, arms crossed, defensively staring at everyone in the room.
MIKE: “Hey,” he kind of comes in and if you are okay with this, he gets rather close to you, and says very quietly, “Hey, I don’t care for your father either.”
GWEN: “Okay, that’s the only thing we have in common then, because I don’t deal with your type.”
MIKE: “Yeah, I kind of thought this conversation might be like this. Hey, you know they found those two guys, right? The guy and the gal. The ones that were messing around Burlington a while and then suddenly disappeared?”
GWEN: “Where’d they find them? Were they alive?”
MIKE: “In Canada. Yep, found them in Canada. They had apparently swam up from Lake Ontario. They kind of got fished out of the water by Border Patrol, and they didn’t have proper documentation to be across the border, and they’re currently being held in custody in Canada. Strangest thing.”
GWEN: No way.
MIKE: “The point where they found them, they really shouldn’t have been able to swim that far out.”
GWEN: “Interesting.”
MIKE: “I feel like you might know more about that than you’re letting on, but that’s not necessarily the point of our conversation right now.”
GWEN: “Exactly! So, why are we here? I have nothing to do with those people and what they were dealing with. Why do you need us here?”
MIKE: “Oh, but you did know him, and they were here for you, and that’s actually very much what we’re talking about. We’re talking about your father. We’re talking about your father’s business in Burlington.”
GWEN: “He shouldn’t still have business in Burlington. I’m the only person—“
MIKE: “Oh, but he does, Ms. Kamen. You know, ah, one of the main sources of income for your father and his business dealings, yes?”
GWEN: “I hate to say that I do, but you know how it goes.”
MIKE: “Well then, why don’t you answer for the room?”
GWEN: “So, I don’t know how much—“
THOM: “Yeah, you ain’t got to say shit.”
GWEN: “No, no. I know. I don’t know how much you guys know about my family history, I guess. What I’m saying right now: is that monster conducting business in this town? We’re going to have to stop it or get the hell out.”
MIKE: “Sweetheart, he’s been conducting business through this town for a long time.”
GWEN: “Is he here?”
MIKE: “No. He doesn’t do any of the day to day shit. What—”
GWEN: “What does any of this have to do with the shit we saw out on the water?”
MIKE: “Ah, that’s the funny thing. It seems like you may have just majorly disrupted a lot of what goes on, what with your father, and more than this other goon kind of already messed it up. Yeah, so your father runs drugs through Champlain.”
GWEN: “Okay.”
MIKE: “And yeah, that little pilings area down there underneath the old electric plant? Yeah, that’s where they mostly come in through. He’s kind of bribed off at least one person in the Coast Guard so that they can get them through one way or another, either through the station or through the secret access in the pilings under the building that it’s not far from.”
DARIUS: “Wait, did her dad basically take a page out of El Chapo’s playbook?”
MIKE: “Hey, you know, if it works, it works.”
DARIUS: “Fair.”
MIKE: “Look, Mr. Kamen is smart, okay? He’s going to do the economic and efficient thing, and moving things across state lines, even across country lines... well, people have been doing that using the Champlain for years. It’s connected by a canal system out to all the Great Lakes.”
DARIUS: “I’ve got another weird question.”
GWEN: “I’m sure you do.”
DARIUS: “Yeah, why is their last name the Japanese word for ‘mask?’”
GWEN: “Huh.”
MIKE: “Repeat that one?”
DARIUS: “Why is their last name the Japanese word for ‘mask?’”
MIKE: No, Darius, I need you to say that word one more time, it keeps cutting it off.
DARIUS: Sorry, why is their last name the Japanese word for ‘mask?’
MIKE: Oh, okay.
GWEN: That’s a really good observation that I didn’t think would be picked up on. That, and there is another meaning to that name as well.
DARIUS: “Okay.”
MIKE: “You know, that’s a real good question. It seems like there could be an answer to that question,” he looks directly at you, “If you’re willing.”
GWEN: “Wait, he’s looking at me?”
MIKE: Yeah.
GWEN: Oh, shit. “I can’t say I know what you mean. My family name has very little to do with me now.”
MIKE: “You know what, it’s fine. It’s not important.”
DARIUS: “Yeah, alright. Morbid curiosity.”
MIKE: “That’s fair, that’s fair. You’ve got a lot of morbid curiosity from what I understand, Dr. Coopersmith.”
DARIUS: “Yep.”
MIKE: “Yeah, so this drug trade coming through Burlington and down into whatever parts, or into and out of, import export, doesn’t matter, does them both. That seems to have been disrupted in a particular way in the last few months, and we’ve been trying to investigate that, because, well, we’ve personally, Agent Wilson and I, have been trying to work your father’s case for years, and then suddenly you turn up in Burlington in a pretty convenient timetable with his whole operation getting flip-flopped. So, you tell me why I’m thinking you might know something about that.”
GWEN: “I’m only here to get away from all of that, and him. I don’t know anything about what’s going on here.”
MIKE: “I kind of find that hard to believe.”
GWEN: “Well, I guess we don’t trust each other then.”
MIKE: “Well, guess that I don’t trust you simply because I know that your father’s been doing business with that specific operation running through this city for a good number of years before the point where you fled, and the fact that you don’t know anything about it, and then went straight to it, and then now it’s all topsy-turvy... fill in the blanks for me.”
GWEN: “I can’t have my own reasons for being here? I like to ski, maybe.”
MIKE: “Yep. Yeah, you are just like your father.”
THOM: “If I might object, you are sounding an awful lot of unhelpful right now, and you said you thought maybe we could help each other, and right now all I’m hearing is you giving Ro a whole mess of shit, so I don’t know what’s going on with her dad’s operation, and frankly, I don’t fucking care. Right now, I’m focused on the actual problem that we’re dealing with. I’m focused on the wendigos that are out there that I’m trying to hunt down, and if this conversation is not helping with that, then I would politely ask if we might take off.”
MIKE: “Uh, Mr. Graves, can I politely ask you to roll back the tapes there for just a second?”
THOM: “Oh, so you’re saying ‘Oh, we’re going to help you with your investigation’ and you suddenly have no goddamn idea? I’m starting to think that we’re here under pretenses that were maybe a little bit exaggerated.”
MIKE: “You said wendigo, didn’t you?”
THOM: “Yeah, I’m not quite sure what the plural of that is though, I think it might be wendigeese.”
MIKE: “It is absolutely not wendigeese”
THOM: “I’m sticking with wendigeese. Anyway, we got a serious wendigeese problem.”
MIKE: “Have you interacted with these—you’re saying that there’s wendigo problems, and you have—have you interacted with these creatures in any way?”
THOM: “I’m sorry, I don’t know nothing about that.”
MIKE: “I feel like you maybe should want to know something about that a-real fast!”
THOM: “I’m sorry officer, I have no idea who you’re talking about. If we’re going to be unhelpful with each other, we’ll just play that—“
MIKE: “They have the smell of you, Albion!”
THOM: “Alright, let’s be helpful then.”
MIKE: “And we are in a remote location!”
DARIUS: “Oh boy.”
THOM: “Alright, I’ll change my tone real quick. I apologize for that. Yeah, no, we did in fact interact with them.”
MIKE: “I need you to describe that particular encounter in 10 seconds or less.”
THOM: “Alright. Went out to where we fought the hags—”
MIKE: “Tick tock, tick tock.”
THOM: “Went out to where we fought the hags, we were investigating, they came chasing one of the hags, we had to outrun them.”
MIKE: “In your car?”
THOM: “In my car.”
MIKE: “The car that you drove here.”
THOM: “The car that I drove here.”
DARIUS: “I kneecapped a couple.”
THOM: “He kneecapped a couple.”
MIKE: “Oh great, so they’re angry at you, that’s even better.”
[MUSIC FADES IN]
MIKE: “So, when they descend on us in this location—” and he is cut off by an unearthly howling that you can hear through the walls, even into this clearly soundproofed basement, “—they’re going to be pissed.”
DARIUS: “Damn it, I’m never going to get to cook.”
THOM: [laughter] “I’m glad that’s your concern. We got to get to my car.”
MIKE: “Yeah, you do need to get to your car, don’t you?” There is a very loud crashing sound from upstairs.
[MUSIC; EPISODE BREAK]
MIKE: Hey everybody, it’s Michael, your game master, no longer sick boy, but this week, injured boy. I’ve got a bum shoulder. Shouldn’t affect the way my voice sounds though. I think that’s how those muscles work. I did the “Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes” song, and it gave me no more answers, please someone help me. I just wanted to say thank you so much to everybody for listening. This episode was one of the more fun ones that we’ve ever recorded, and if you enjoyed the first half, you ain’t seen nothing yet. The end of this episode, it goes places, and I genuinely cannot wait for you to hear it, and maybe even yell about it on social media. If you want to follow us there, it’s Twitter and Facebook at GMMCast. We rely solely on word of mouth, we don’t pay for advertisings, so if you want to tweet about us, we have the hashtag, GMMCast, and we would love for you to spread the word about the show that you enjoy listening to, and especially after the end of this episode, oh boy! Oh, you are not ready for this. Wee! We also have a Discord where you can, well, have some discourse about the show and hang out with cool people that listen, and also us, the cast. All that information is in the episode description. I wanted to say thank you to my friend William Blake for some assistance with editing this week, and speaking of that end of the episode, huge thanks to my buddy Joe Nelson, AKA Naekid, N-A-E-K-I-D, yes he is that kind of a clever guy, for some soundtrack assistance. I think you’ll hear it. If you want to go check him out, you can find him on Instagram at N-A-E-K-I-D.E-X-E, Naekid.exe, and also if you really feel like it, you can follow him on Soundcloud at Big Snacc with two Cs. Very NSFW, but hilarious. Thanks so much to the Pocket Podcast Network for hosting our show. There’s other wonderful programs such as Simultaneous Catch, which, I mean, football is not on right now, but it’s a great football show, Home Viewing, STEAMpunks, it’s just—ah, it’s all so good, and if you want to support us and the network, you can make me say things on the air by buying a Pocket Note. So, go to pocketpodcastnetwork.com/pocketnotes to make me do words or songs. I will sing. I will sing, I swear. No one can stop me, I’ve gone mad with power.
[MUSIC; AD FOR NO DICE]
DANIEL: Hi, I’m Daniel, game master of the actual play podcast, No Dice. Join magic assholes Ixen,—
BRITTY: “There’s a score between me and doors, and so far, doors are zero.”
DANIEL: -- Perry,—
HUE: “They definitely have a lot of daggers happening that they’re hiding in various spaces.”
DANIEL: -- Saoirse,--
LOU: “I always love getting stories from adventurers, I really wish I could just have one of my own.”
DANIEL: -- and a whole host of guest players. You can find No Dice on the first Friday of every month on Apple podcasts, Google Play, or pocketpodcastnetwork.com.
THOM: “Alright, you guys have a red tape dispenser, right? So, I can just open fire on them right now and this ain’t going to blow back on me?”
MIKE: “I expect you to open fire on these things!”
THOM: “Alright, cool. Alright gang, let’s get running.”
MIKE: Alright. As you are running up through back the way that you came, you find your way into that servant passageway, and you see something pretty startling. You see a wendigo, and you see somebody who is very handsome, and they are both basically at each other’s necks right now. One of them is just tattered and disgusting and just coarse, stringy hair all around in just haphazard patches, which—and it has a variety of nasty scrapes oozing various fluids. That is the wendigo that currently has its teeth sunk into this White Court Vampire’s arm, and you can see blood is just flowing from various gashes on this dude also. So, your way back that you came is—
THOM: I’m drawing on it.
MIKE: Yeah, what’s that?
THOM: I’m drawing on it, and I’m going to take—
MIKE: Okay, because the way that you came is currently blocked by this very nasty tango. So, if you’re—
THOM: I am aiming right at its head, and I’m going to shoot it off the guy.
MIKE: Okay, and when you say the guy, do you mean the vampire?
THOM: Yeah.
MIKE: Not the wendigo?
THOM: I’m shooting the vampire off the—the wendigo off the vampire.
MIKE: Okay. That’s the thing that I wanted you to clarify.
THOM: Cool.
MIKE: So, we’re going to go into—we’re going to let you do this action first, and then we’re going to go into initiative order.
THOM: Three pluses, with my Guns of a four, that is a seven.
MIKE: Okay.
THOM: And it’s not powered up, but I am using Gungnir.
MIKE: Okay, cool. So, I guess the question is, are you going to take the time to aim or—no, you just went for a roll, hoping that your aim would be good enough, and you know what? It was. So, it did actually hit it. You hit this thing in the head, and it looks like a significant chunk of this thing’s head has been blown straight off. It’s not stopped moving yet. It is extremely large, and you can tell that there is a deep ancestral power to this thing, but it was enough of a blow that it seems to have stunned it in a way that the White Court that is fighting it has a chance to get a little bit of revenge, and he just sinks his own teeth into the wendigo’s neck meat and just rips out its throat. Initiative.
THOM: Alright, Alertness is three.
MIKE: Okay, I need a new—okay, three is Albion. Who’s on initiative two?
CHRISTINE: I am.
MIKE: That’s right, you’ve got that upgraded. Ro, what’s your Alertness? Gwen?
THOM: Ro’s Alertness is also two.
GWEN: Yeah, sorry, it’s also a two. I’m on Push to Talk, so I couldn’t do both things at once.
MIKE: Oh, okay, and is Sylvester’s Alertness still a one?
DARIUS: Yeah.
MIKE: Okay, amazing. Excuse me. Okay, cool, and okay, got it. Okay, so at top of initiative, let’s start this fresh. So, this guy in front of you—you did just blast a big hole in the head of this wendigo, and the White Court—you can tell he’s a White Court despite—sorry, let me try that again. You can clearly tell that this dude is a White Court at this point, because he’s preternaturally handsome, and fighting like an actual beast. So, he has just ripped the throat out of this wendigo, and its movements are jerky and spastic as though it’s probably dead or dying, and he looks at you with just nasty fluid all over his face, and he starts asking you if you are all safe and need escort, when another wendigo flies down the hallway, grabs him by the back of his neck, and throws him into the kitchen. You hear a large amount of crashing and metal hitting metal and dropping on the floor as the wendigo dives after its quarry. This way in front of you is now open. What do you do, Albion?
THOM: I am rounding the corner into the kitchen, I am standing in the doorway, and I am just unloading on this thing.
MIKE: Okie dokie. Make me a Weapons roll then.
THOM: Alright, that is a plus two, that is six Guns.
MIKE: Okay. Oh, that’s a bad roll. I’m going to justify it with he’s rather distracted with his meal. Okay, so you definitely hit, and it looks like, yep, you beat it by three, so, ow. That’s going to deal it a lot of damage. You get some really solid shots into this thing from Gungnir into its center mass, and it ignores you completely. You know that you hurt this thing pretty bad, but it is not stopping. It is just going for this dude.
THOM: Then I’m yelling “Hey!”
MIKE: Okay. Desdemona, what do you do?
CHRISTINE: I’ll also come around the corner, and I’d like to cast Aggresso, my attack.
MIKE: Oh, okay.
THOM: I’m sorry, that yell came out real loud on my read.
MIKE: [laughter] That’ll be great. It’s all good. So, that’s a four shift attack. So, you need to make your Discipline and get a four.
CHRISTINE: That is a two.
MIKE: Oh. So, you can either tag an Aspect, or take two physical damage, or you can let two of that power out into the scene wildly.
CHRISTINE: Could I tag Hey, I Can Actually Do This?
MIKE: Okay. Yep, you can do that, you just have to spend a Fate Point. How many of those do you have right now?
CHRISTINE: If I spend this one, I’ll have one left. I started the game with three.
MIKE: Okay, I’m going to warn you right now, you are in a situation of extreme violence, and using those Fate Points is a risky move unless you absolutely need to, so I’m going give you that ‘mortal danger’ warning right now at what is effectively the top of the fight scene and just give that to you straight.
CHRISTINE: Okay, so I take the two physical damage if I don’t spend this Fate Point?
MIKE: It’s either you take the two physical stress to maintain the control and hit it with the full proper power, or you let two of those shifts of power disperse into the environment, and that can do all kinds of things.
CHRISTINE: I’ll take the two physical stress.
MIKE: Okay, that one is called backlash, the other one is called fallout. So, you’re going to take the two stress backlash to maintain control of Aggresso, yes?
CHRISTINE: Yeah.
MIKE: Okay. Alright, so you do so, and I’m going to roll defense against it. Ah cool, I love rolling bad!
CHRISTINE: Yay.
MIKE: Good, okay. I rolled less bad, so you do hit it, and you are going to deal it damage with five shifts, because it’s a weapon four on top of the attack four, and you only beat it by one, so it takes five shifts of spirit damage from your spell, which you must also mark one stress on your mental track for casting it.
CHRISTINE: Okay.
MIKE: Cool. It feels something interacting with where its soul ought to be, and it howls, and it turns away from the thing that it was ready to eat, and it looks right at you. Its eyes are filled not with hate, but a need to eat. Do you have a supplementary action, or is it Ro’s turn?
CHRISTINE: What would count as supplementary?
MIKE: Basically trying to do anything else right now, so.
CHRISTINE: Can I run out?
MIKE: You can attempt to run, yes.
CHRISTINE: Yeah, I’ll do that.
MIKE: So, you’ll be doing this at a minus one. So, if you want to get into the front area, you’ll have to actually make an Athletics roll to get across this zone. Your target is only going to be one.
CHRISTINE: Okay. That’s a zero because I have no Athletics.
MIKE: Okay. So, you can’t quite get to the next zone, but you are moving down that hallway some. You can make me an Alertness roll for being down there a little bit.
CHRISTINE: Okay.
MIKE: This one’s for free.
CHRISTINE: It’s a six.
MIKE: Wow! You really know how to pick them. Okay, so your amazing success on this Alertness roll paints a pretty grim picture. You can hear and see around you and make out from the cacophony a fair idea of what’s going on. Wendigos have descended on this particular location, and you can hear a mix of howls and gunshots and just all kinds of violence. You can hear some from the upstairs. You know that there’s one injured wendigo in the kitchen grappling—formerly grappling with a very injured White Court, and you can see in the lobby that there is at least one more wendigo and at least one more White Court Vampire that are having it out. So, Ro, it is your turn.
GWEN: Alright, so first thing I need to know is did the White Court drop a weapon of any kind while he was being grappled by the Wendigo?
MIKE: That is going to be an Alertness roll.
GWEN: Alright, one second.
MIKE: Your target is three.
GWEN: That’s a zero.
MIKE: Wow, negative three, amazing!
GWEN: Oh wait, negative one.
MIKE: Yeah, negative one Alertness. In the scrap, there was a single light source in this hallway, and it looks like the wendigo bashed against it and took it out, so it’s a little dark and you can’t immediately tell if there’s a weapon dropped there.
THOM: If I may offer, you would probably know enough to know that Albion likely has a gun on him. More than one.
GWEN: Yeah, that was my next thing. So, I’m going to—
THOM: Yeah, wavelength.
GWEN: So, I’m going to yell over at Albion to toss me a gun, catch it, and cast a veil on myself.
MIKE: Okay, well Albion’s going to have to try to throw that to you on his own turn.
THOM: You can snatch it out of my pocket, honestly, out of my holster.
GWEN: Yeah, okay.
MIKE: Okay, I’m going to go with that’s a maneuver to do, and I’m going to go with that’s a Burglary with a target of three.
GWEN: Okay.
MIKE: Sticky hands.
GWEN: That’s a one.
MIKE: You need physical dice.
GWEN: I do.
MIKE: Okay, so, you can either fumble around in his pocket and not get it, or you can throw me a Fate Point.
GWEN: I’m going to go with a Fate Point because I need a weapon.
MIKE: Alright, what are you tagging?
GWEN: I’m going to for I’m All In, Baby, because I’m running, grabbing the gun, and I’m just going to keep going. I just need to protect myself or someone else, so I’m doing this.
MIKE: I am genuinely surprised that you did not pick Half Manic, Half Pixie Thief Girl for the stealing and pickpocketing move, but I’m going to take your explanation of your aspect choice and say, “Good.” Alright, so you have a gun. If you’re going to try to do a veil, it’s going to be a supplementary action, and you’re going to be at a minus one to do it, so that’s up to you if you want to do a bad one this turn. Or if you want to wait.
GWEN: I’m going to wait then.
MIKE: Okay. I’m only giving you this extra advice because this is a genuinely life-threatening situation. Sylvester, it is your turn.
DARIUS: Oh boy.
MIKE: Yeah.
DARIUS: So, where am I in relation to this, the hallway or the kitchen?
MIKE: You’re not in the kitchen currently. So, the scene is set up in zones. The kitchen is its own zone. The hallway outside of it that goes to both the kitchen door and the basement access door as well as the foyer is its own zone that most of you—actually, all of you are currently occupying, and then there is of course the foyer out there. So, the four player characters are all in that hallway in various parts.
DARIUS: Okay, so I am going to go into the kitchen and grab something, probably something hard and blunt and metallic, and I’m going to try to bash this thing in the fucking head.
THOM: That’s my man. That’s my man right there!
MIKE: Okay, so I’m going to say meat tenderizer.
DARIUS: Yes, that’s good, we can do that.
MIKE: So, okay. Excellent.
THOM: And you can roll with Fists for that since you’re a Street Fighter.
DARIUS: Yeah.
MIKE: So, you can cross one zone without difficulty, but it will make the attack a supplementary action unless you do a sprint.
DARIUS: Okay.
MIKE: So, doing a sprint means you have to make an Athletics roll and try to beat a one.
DARIUS: Oh, okay.
MIKE: Actually, I’m going to make it a two just because this particular kitchen has been messed up a bit and there are objects in the way, and you may not want to step on that knife.
DARIUS: Okay. I have a six, a four, a three, and a three.
MIKE: Oh, that is a plus one. Yeah, we should get you some Fate dice.
DARIUS: Yeah, I just rolled—
MIKE: Okay, so you got a plus one on your Athletics of two, so that’s a plus two, which means you can in fact sprint through those zones and the obstacle around them.
DARIUS: Yay.
MIKE: Alright, make your Fists roll.
DARIUS: Okay. That’s a five, a four, a three, and a one.
MIKE: Okay, so that’s a neutral.
DARIUS: Okay.
MIKE: So, the Fists is going to be a three. Son of a bitch.
DARIUS: Oh boy.
MIKE: It rolled two minus.
MIKE: So, you actually are going to hit it. The best part is, you are going to—you beat it by one shift, and I’m going to say that this particular improvised weapon, it’s hard. We’re going to call it a weapon two.
DARIUS: Yay.
MIKE: yeah, it’s not like you picked up a ball-peen hammer, you picked up a big ass meat tenderizer.
DARIUS: Woo.
MIKE: Alright, so that’s going to do three shifts of stress to this thing, and because you have—I know that Soccer Kicks isn’t you kicking right now, but you do have a feature that when you use Fists to strike an unarmored opponent, you get weapon against it, so yeah, you’ve actually dealt that damage because you’ve managed to add weapon to bypass its sort of natural skin armor of just not taking damage hard.
THOM: So, the way I picture this is him kicking it in the gut and then just smacking it across the face with a hammer.
DARIUS: Boink.
MIKE: I was going to justify the Soccer Kicks feature by saying you got powerful legs, and you use them to put your force of body behind this strike.
DARIUS: There you go.
MIKE: So, you basically are Superman punching a wendigo with a meat tenderizer, a sentence that I don’t think anyone has ever said before.
DARIUS: Pow ha ha.
THOM: Not big surprise.
MIKE: Okay, so amazing. It’s not too pleased with what you have done at all, except it now looks at you with—it’s not a smile, because it doesn’t seem capable of smiling, but a demented look that you could call akin to a smile, and you hear the word, “Foods!” It goes to eat you.
DARIUS: Oh boy.
THOM: Oh no. Oh no.
MIKE: Alright. I’m going to need you to make me an Athletics roll to dodge, because it is snapping its maw.
DARIUS: Yay. Yeah, I got plus one.
MIKE: Okay, so that is Defense three.
THOM: Defense three is not that bad.
MIKE: That’s right, Defense three is not that bad. Actually, I think you can use Fists in this case as a defense, because it is technically using Fists against you.
DARIUS: Okay.
THOM: So, in that case, that’s a four, a five even.
MIKE: Yeah, that’s good! You’re going to take less damage from this then.
THOM: No, that’s a four, that’s a four.
DARIUS: Tough Stuff doesn’t work with wendigos because claws and teeth, right?
MIKE: Unfortunately in this case he is going for chompers, and his are sharp.
DARIUS: Yeah, that counts as a blade I guess.
MIKE: Yeah, it won’t give you your natural armor one against this.
DARIUS: Yeah, that’s what I figured.
MIKE: So, it also rolled a plus one. So, it is going to sink its teeth into you, and you are going to take four physical damage.
DARIUS: Shit. Ow.
MIKE: Four physical stress.
DARIUS: Fuck!
MIKE: So, you only have three physical stress.
DARIUS: Great.
MIKE: So, what you need to do is one of the following: you need to spend a Fate Point to justify your better defense, you need to take a consequence to negate damage, or you need to be taken out of the scene.
DARIUS: Spend a Fate Point.
MIKE: Alright, and what Fate Point are you—what Aspect are you tagging?
DARIUS: Three-Legged Horse.
THOM: I would say Aim Low, Go High, like you cross counter it. You’re deadly.
DARIUS: Okay. Fuck, I don’t know what I’m doing.
MIKE: Okay, Aim Low, Go High. Alright, yeah sure. Cool. So, you’re going to whip the meat tenderizer up in its face to try to keep it from biting you, and yeah, given that you’re boosting your defense in this way, it means that you’re not going to get savagely bitten, because your Fist defense is going to beat its attack.
DARIUS: Neat.
MIKE: So, actually it’s going to tie. So, congrats. You did not get your arm bit real bad.
DARIUS: Sweet.
MIKE: Okay, yeah. So, that was its turn, and now it’s the White Court behind it. Excuse me.
THOM: Albion’s going to yell at him to clear out.
MIKE: I need to make a couple rolls. Oh, ooo, alright. So, it just tried to pull out some sort of small blade and try to stab into the wendigo. Apparently, the wendigo kind of saw this move coming and turned around and just snatched his hand and stopped him from stabbing him, and because he beat him so bad on the defense roll, he’s going to keep a grip on that hand, and the White Court that is down and is now being sort of grabbed by this badly injured wendigo is like, “No, you clear out!” Albion, your turn.
THOM: I’m shoving my gun in this thing’s mouth and firing.
MIKE: Okay, well to get there, you’re going to need to cross a zone that has a lot of obstacles in it, so you’re going to need to make an Athletics roll to sprint, just like our good friend Sylvester did.
THOM: Cool, my Athletics roll is a four.
MIKE: Okay, so you have successfully crossed the zones, and you are now in this thing's face, so make that Weapons roll—Guns.
THOM: Albion’s going to be like, “Hungry, motherfucker?” and put the gun in its mouth, fire. Three pluses! That is an attack of seven.
MIKE: Whew, okay. Fantastic. Alright, so good, and it rolled bad, so yeah, you shoot it in the face. It doesn’t have a face anymore, so congrats. The wendigo is Faceless, with Alex Rudinger on drums. This joke won’t land for anyone. Alright, Desdemona, it’s your turn.
THOM: Is it still moving?
MIKE: It’s moving, but you don’t think it’s going to be able to eat anything, or really do much.
DARIUS: He dead.
MIKE: It’s pretty hosed.
THOM: So, it got taken out?
MIKE: Yes. Des?
CHRISTINE: Let’s see, can I see any wendigos in the lobby where we’re trying to leave from, or any in the way?
MIKE: Between you and the door that gets out to Albion’s car? You don’t have any directly in your way. However, you can see more than one in the lobby now. They’re clearly about to overwhelm whomever they’re approaching.
CHRISTINE: Could I cast my block spell now, Helpi?
MIKE: Okay, are you trying to do a block on yourself?
CHRISTINE: Can I see if I can get a way to block them from coming closer?
MIKE: Okay.
CHRISTINE: Or keep the way open and clear so that we can get to the door?
MIKE: Yeah, I think putting a spirit block in there actually makes a lot of sense, so perfect. That’ll give them an obstacle to have to clear to get to you.
CHRISTINE: Yeah!
MIKE: So, roll me Discipline!
CHRISTINE: Okay. Be good, be good, be good. Four.
MIKE: Hey, that’s just enough. Alright, so take a one stress mental hit.
CHRISTINE: Okay, and because I already had the one, that goes to the two.
MIKE: Okay, and every round that you keep that up, you’re going to have to keep maintaining it.
CHRISTINE: Okay.
MIKE: Alright, is that your action for the round?
CHRISTINE: Yes.
MIKE: Ro.
GWEN: Alright, I’m going to cast a veil on myself.
MIKE: Okay. So, at this point I assume that you’re just reflexively trying to do that hide trick that you know.
GWEN: Yes. I feel like I want to keep getting better at this, so Ro’s been practicing how to do it every chance she gets.
MIKE: Okay, great. So, how much power are you going to put into it?
GWEN: Enough for just Ro not to be seen, so I don’t know how much that should be.
MIKE: It’s however much you want it to be, because that’s just now the difficulty that they’re going to have to clear to spot you.
GWEN: Okay, so because I’m picking a number, I’m going to say like a two or a three.
MIKE: Two or three is pretty low, but it would make them have to roll against you. This is based off your Deceit, so you can set whatever number you want.
GWEN: Okay, I’m going to go with a four then and just hope for the best with rolling.
MIKE: Okay. Roll it, roll it. Hey!
GWEN: That’s a five.
MIKE: Alright, you have successfully put a four strength veil up in front of yourself, or over yourself.
GWEN: Hell yeah. And then, from where I’m standing, can I see any wendigo or any immediate threats?
MIKE: Not from where you’re standing, but you could go to the end of the hall where Desdemona is, and you’d be at the end of this zone, and you’d be able to see in there.
GWEN: Yeah, I’m going to do that. I’m going to run up behind Des and kind of look past her into that area.
MIKE: Yeah, it is a mess. All of this ornate stuff is getting knocked about by wendigos that have clearly crashed in through the windows and are charging toward what you assume to be either an FBI agent, a White Court Vampire, or both. Alright, Sylvester.
DARIUS: Yep.
MIKE: What do you do?
DARIUS: I guess I could check on that White Court who was kind of getting his ass kicked and try to patch him up if it’s possible. I don’t know, probably not, but I might as well at least try.
MIKE: Sure! Make me a Scholarship medicine roll then.
DARIUS: Alright.
MIKE: I’m going to give you a target of three.
DARIUS: Okay, I got a six, a six, a five and a two.
MIKE: Damn, that’s plus two. So, your Scholarship roll is four, I mean your base is four, your roll is plus two, so that’s six, so that’s three over what you needed.
DARIUS: Cool.
MIKE: Great. So, you get good information off of looking at this guy. So, the funny thing is that you get good information that this should be mortal wounds, what you’re looking at. This dude has been mortally wounded, but you know that he’s not a mortal. So, the way that he is still moving and reacting to the scene, you can tell that he may not be as mortally wounded as you would think he is. Because you succeeded so well, I’m trying to justify the fact that you know that he will currently survive what looks to be what should do him in.
DARIUS: Oh, okay.
MIKE: Yes. So, yeah, you think he’s currently going to live, but that’s all you’ve got. You don’t know why you have that feeling, because by all appearances, he should not.
DARIUS: Alright. Yeah, I don’t know what to do, because we killed the one thing, and there are others in the hallway, or?
MIKE: Well, you’d have to go out into the hallway to find out.
DARIUS: True, there is that, and where is everyone else? Because I know Albion’s in that hallway.
MIKE: They’re in the hallway.
DARIUS: So, I guess I’ll go back into the hallway with the meat tenderizer.
MIKE: Okay. Alright, make me an Athletics roll to get out there on this turn, because you still have obstacles in your way. So, it’s a two.
DARIUS: Six, five, four, two.
MIKE: Yep, you get it.
DARIUS: Okay.
MIKE: Yes. The hallway actually has fewer people than you expect, because you can’t see Ro, but make me an Alertness roll to see Ro or not.
DARIUS: Okay.
MIKE: Because that is the situation.
DARIUS: Five, five, two, and a one.
MIKE: Ooo, so your Alertness is not a native four, so with a zero on that roll, you cannot see her at all.
DARIUS: Yep. “So, where’d she go?”
MIKE: You don’t know, but now it’s the top of initiative. It’s the wendigos turn, and Des and Ro, a very unpleasant sight greets you as both of these wendigos just pounce on this person as they’re unloading gunshots at them, to seemingly basically no effect, and they just pounce on this person and start going to town. Screams are starting to die out and be replaced with howls of just hunger and need, and it is Albion.
THOM: Alrighty, I’m going to see if I can make it to the end of that hallway and when I see them attacking this guy, is he still alive?
MIKE: You’re going to need to cross two different zones with at least one impediment, so I need an Athletics roll for you to get that far.
THOM: Well, my Athletics is a four for that.
MIKE: Okay, so you can get clear out into the foyer. Yeah, you can’t even see the person that they’re on top of at this point, but you do know that they’re currently rather distracted with this task.
THOM: Alright, I’m going to hand Des my keys—actually, no, I’m just going to be like, “Ro, take the keys.” I’m pretty sure Ro has gone invisible, so I toss my keys and expect Ro to catch them.
GWEN: That’s expecting a lot from Ro.
DARIUS: Yeah.
MIKE: Okay, Des, as this is happening, I’m going to resolve this key catch on Ro’s turn, because it’s technically the same initiative as you. What are you doing in the meantime?
THOM: I wasn’t finished. I was going to start shooting.
MIKE: Well, I mean you did have to do a sprint action to get out there, and you kind of took a second action to try to hand off your stuff, so—
THOM: Oh, well I’m not going to do that then.
MIKE: I’m going to say that that’s honestly the better choice here dramatically, so I think we should stick to that.
THOM: Okay.
MIKE: Des, what’s up?
CHRISTINE: I’m happy to take another mental stress to keep the Malhelpi up.
MIKE: Oh, Albion, you can see that there is just a wall of unpleasant spiritual faces that are facing away from you between you and the wendigos and their apparent victim. You’re pretty sure that’s Des’s doing.
CHRISTINE: Can I also start heading toward the door as well while holding it?
MIKE: Yeah, I think you can maintain that there.
CHRISTINE: I’ll start heading for the door.
MIKE: Okay. Outside of the door, you can see that there are still some wendigos that have not made it to the building and are racing toward it. Ro, roll me an Athletics. I’m going to go with target one.
GWEN: Yeah, that’s a two!
MIKE: Okay, you actually catch the keys! They do not clatter to the floor. That was the only punishment for that, but hey, it probably would have drawn some attention, so cool. You now have the keys. What are you going to do?
THOM: Real quick Albion was going to just say, “We have to draw them away, if they start eating these White Courts, they’re just going to get to the point where we can’t stop them.”
MIKE: Okay, alright.
GWEN: I had an idea of what I thought I was going to do, but if I have the keys, it’s not a great idea, so maybe I’m going to go around to the edge of the walls and head towards the entrance and leave.
MIKE: Okay. Cool. So, I believe because of your supernatural speed, your inhuman speed, you can cross a zone without actually being hindered on your stealth, so sweet. Yeah, you can make it out the door and probably to the car if you spend your entire action just sort of getting there.
GWEN: I was just going to open the door and wait at the door to see what happens.
MIKE: Des kind of already opened the door.
GWEN: Oh yeah. Is Des outside, or at the door?
MIKE: At the door.
GWEN: Okay, I’m going to run to the car and turn it on. Can I get there?
MIKE: Okay, alright. So, the car has started.
GWEN: Okay, cool.
MIKE: Alright. We now go to the top—no, it’s Sylvester’s turn.
DARIUS: Yay.
MIKE: [laughter] So, you did just hear Albion’s car start. It’s not exactly a quiet car.
DARIUS: Okay.
MIKE: It’s not a super loud car either, but it’s not like one of those electric cars.
DARIUS: Right. So, I guess I should head towards that.
MIKE: That seems like that might be the best move.
DARIUS: Yeah.
MIKE: Okay, give me a sprint, because you are crossing a couple different zones.
DARIUS: Okay.
MIKE: I believe it’s just a two for Athletics.
DARIUS: That’s a six, four, three, and another three.
MIKE: Okay, so that’s a plus one. You definitely cleared that. So, hey, you’ve made it to the vehicle. Are you doing anything on your way there, or just hopping in?
DARIUS: I’m just going to hop in.
MIKE: Okay, cool. It is wendigo time, unfortunately. They are going to make a quick roll. Ooh, cool. So, they definitely have taken notice of you, Albion, since you are not talking quietly and people are running past, so they are going to start leaping toward you.
THOM: Yep, there’s still a wall in their way, right?
MIKE: There is a block in their way, so each of them is going to have to try to get through that. Holy shit! Well, that one does, and that one is stopped by it. So, one, very much bloodied from ‘having jumped through glass and from having been munching on somebody’ wendigo does jump—just makes it through your spiritual block and he has to spend his time wading through that wall of ghastly force, but he is now atop you. Albion.
THOM: Yeah?
MIKE: Please react in some way.
THOM: Well, is he literally on me, or is he just charging at me?
MIKE: When I say atop you, I do not mean physically touching, but he’s in your space.
THOM: Alright, cool.
MIKE: He’s in your face.
THOM: Alright, I’m going to put a bullet in his head, and then I’m going to start sprinting and get in my car.
MIKE: Alright, your Guns roll is going to pretty well determine where that bullet goes, so give it a shot.
THOM: That is two pluses. That is six attack.
MIKE: Okay, I rolled neutral, so you do hit it! You do some damage, but you can’t quite swing it up in time to hit him in the face. Your instincts tell you to pull the trigger a little sooner, so you get him in the gut, and it does not look like a pleasant time, but it’s still up.
THOM: Is Agent Pyburn still near me?
MIKE: Agent Pyburn you have not seen since you all kind of sort of ran out.
THOM: Alright, cool. Well, there’s a lot of White Courts here that I don’t want them to eat, so I’m just going to run to my car.
MIKE: Okay.
THOM: “Ro, get ready to drive!”
MIKE: Desdemona, it is now your turn.
CHRISTINE: I will GTFO.
MIKE: Actually, I do need Albion to make an Athletics to sprint, because this is your second action here, so your target’s going to be two.
THOM: Alright, three pluses, one minus, my Athletics is a four.
MIKE: Okay, yeah, you’ve definitely got to your car. Des, GTFO.
CHRISTINE: Alright, I’m going to head out.
MIKE: Alright, make that Athletics roll. I’m going to say that there is an obstacle in this zone, because it’s wendigo-shaped.
CHRISTINE: That’s a negative two.
MIKE: What’s your Athletics?
CHRISTINE: I don’t have an Athletics.
DARIUS: Shit.
MIKE: Great! So, you’re not going anywhere unless you’ve got some Fate Points for me.
CHRISTINE: I have an idea!
MIKE: What is that Idea?
CHRISTINE: Sometimes Jack Helps Me, No, That’s Bad.
GWEN: Oh no.
MIKE: Oh! So, you would like to voluntarily deepen your debt. Oh, this pleases me so!
THOM: It does not please me.
CHRISTINE: I thought it might. I’ll spend that Fate Point.
MIKE: Oh, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, you’re not spending a Fate Point for that.
CHRISTINE: Oh, I’m getting one, sweet!
MIKE: Oh, this is your trouble that I’m dealing with now. [laughter] Oh, this is going to save you right now, but it’s going to be so much worse for you later, I love it. Okay.
CHRISTINE: Do it for the story.
MIKE: It’s absolutely being done for the story, babe!
[MUSIC FADES IN]
MIKE: So, you unconsciously reach out in your mind space to the entity only known to you as Mr. Jack to help you, and I don’t think that the wendigo was expecting the ironic reversal that it’s about to receive. Something physically manifests in front of you and eats the wendigo whole.
CHRISTINE: Holy shit!
THOM: Holy fuck.
DARIUS: That’s the work of an enemy Stand.
MIKE: Before you even have a chance to properly see what is happening, you just understand limbs. There are limbs, there are so many limbs, and two of them that do not go in the right places have grabbed you, picked you up, and hammer tossed you.
DARIUS: Did she just get yeeted?
MIKE: Yes, yes she did.
THOM: This bitch owe me, yeet!
MIKE: So, I’m going to do a quick roll. Ow. You are going to take four—no, make that five physical stress from being thrown with such force to land at the feet of the car.
CHRISTINE: That takes me out.
MIKE: Well, you can take consequences to not be taken out.
CHRISTINE: I could take consequences. I obviously have passed out at the foot of the car.
MIKE: You don’t have to have.
CHRISTINE: No?
MIKE: No, taking consequences means that you aren’t taken out of a scene.
CHRISTINE: Oh, okay, because I had my two that was crossed out, I had my one and my three available, but that’s all that I have, so how many consequences would I have to take?
MIKE: Well, if you were to take a mild consequence, you would knock that down to a three stress hit. If you took a moderate consequence, that would knock it down to a one stress hit. If you took a severe, it would negate all of the damage, but you’d have a severe consequence.
CHRISTINE: How about a mild consequence and I can cross off that three?
MIKE: Okay. What is the mild consequence you would like to take?
CHRISTINE: Knocked unconscious?
MIKE: That is not a mild consequence.
CHRISTINE: No? I don’t know what mild consequences are.
THOM: Winded.
MIKE: Mild consequences clear once a scene is completely done, if you have the justification to clear them.
DARIUS: Concussion.
MIKE: That’s worse than a mild.
CHRISTINE: Migraine.
MIKE: I’m just going to say Banged Up.
CHRISTINE: I’m Banged Up.
MIKE: This is a temporary Aspect on you that can be tagged against you for an extra plus two later, if it should arise.
CHRISTINE: Yep, I got yeeted, and now I’m banged up.
MIKE: Basically, in midair you spin, and when you land, you’re sort of rolling on your side, so obviously you are abraised by this action, but you still have your senses about you, and I’m going to say that in doing so, you can basically take supplementary action stuff to get in the car. And Ro, can you drive?
GWEN: Hell yeah.
CHRISTINE: Alright, I’m in the car.
MIKE: Alright.
THOM: I’m going to tell Ro to lay on the horn, and I’m just going to poke my upper body out the moon roof.
MIKE: Okay, yes. Ro, you just start blasting on the horn as you’re driving away, and you can tell that it’s definitely caught the attention of the wendigos, and I’m just going to say that you get the hell out of Dodge, with wendigos following behind you, at least for some distance, and you can tell that you have definitely drawn a lot of them—if not all, you can’t totally know for sure—away.
[OUTRO MUSIC]
MIKE: That’s not the one I want. How is that not the correct thing?
THOM: This is going very well.
MIKE: I know! This is a bad recording that I’m doing.
THOM: Big oof.
GWEN: I hope everyone is enjoying our podcast!
CHRISTINE: Please stand by, [imitating “The Girl From Ipanema”] do do do, do do do do.
THOM: [imitating Chris Jericho] Now, Michael, I love this thing you’re saying where you’re gonna do the thing, but before we get to that, I’d like to tell you about Audible.com, it’s this service—
MIKE: Fuck me. Yeah, so I’m going to skip right to the part where I tell you what you’re defending against.
DARIUS: So, Champ is a Wizard, but you know what else has a Wizard? Raid: Shadow Legends.
MIKE: [laughter] Woo!
THOM: Looks like our party’s in an uncomfortable spot. You know what’s comfortable? MeUndies.
GWEN: We’re in a real fishy situation. Speaking of fish, have you guys tried Blue Apron?
DARIUS: Boy, we’re in a hairy predicament, you know what’s not hairy? Dollar Shave Club.
THOM: Looks like if Ro’s not careful, she’ll be sleeping with the fishes, and if you want a good night’s sleep, try Casper Mattresses.
MIKE: [laughter] Oh man! Oh, there it is. That’s the power I wanted. Okay, cool. Now that we’ve actually got our gag reel for the end, hooray.
[MUSIC] Pocket Podcast Network. Quality programming, right to your pocket.
Transcribed by Nicholas Johnson (https://draconick.com/)
Twitter: @DraconickGaming